Talking With Your Son About His First Time at Camp

Sending your son away to camp for the first time is a major milestone for most families, one that is often marked by excitement, anticipation and some anxiety.  Although camp is certainly about making friends and having fun, it is also about being on your own and being part of a community.   

There are several things that can help a first time camper.  Involve your son in shopping and packing for camp, pack a favorite personal item, talk about the fun things they are looking forward to doing at camp, share your own stories about your first forays away from home as a child (keeping the spin positive!), point out what your son does well and how that will be an asset at camp, and post an encouraging letter one or two days before camp starts. 

One of the most important things you as a parent can do to help prepare your child for both of these aspects of camp is to talk with them about it before they go.  In fact it may be better to have several shorter talks rather than one long conversation as children often absorb more when there is less to think about at one time.  Children usually do better with this sort of conversation if it is part of a more general discussion, such as at the dinner table or while riding in the car doing errands. 

Use language that demonstrates your confidence in him.  The types of phrases that can help include, I know you will do well, I am proud of your abilities, You are capable of succeeding.  What does not help is saying things like, I will check up on you every day, If you are not having a good time I will pick you up.  These indicate that you do not believe in his ability to succeed. 

The following are some sample topics for discussion that will help prepare you child emotionally for their adventure at camp:

MAKING NEW FRIENDS.  Camp is not anything if it is not about being with and making new friends.  If you are shy about meeting new kids, then learn to get to know others by being a good listener.  To make friends you have to be a friend.  Remember that not everyone you encounter has to be your friend and you do not have to be everyone else's friend.  As long as you treat others with respect and they do the same with you, then having one or two friends at camp is fine.  Of course, if you have more, that is great!

DOING NEW ACTIVITIES.  There are many exciting things to do at camp, many of which you may never have tried before.  (If your son is tending to be a bit homesick or is worried about being homesick, remind him what it was they were excited about doing at camp when they first thought about going there.  Sometimes as the first day of camp looms near they forget about why they were originally excited to go.)  You may not like all the activities or you may be better at some than others.  That is normal.  I, however, expect you to try.  The more you put into camp, the more you will get out of it!

COOPERATING.  You, like every other camper there, will be part of a group.  I expect you to cooperate with others and help out.  That is part of what makes camp so special, kids helping each other out.  Most kids will help you if you are friendly and help them.

GIVING YOURSELF TIME.  One thing about camp is that almost everything is new: the kids, the activities, the routines, the bunk you sleep in, the bathrooms, the food and more.  It takes a few days to get adjusted, so be patient with yourself.  Most of the time you will be having so much fun you will not mind all the changes, but if you do, remember that you will get so used to things that by the time you come home you will miss them all!

GETTING HELP.  Everyone has good days and bad days.  If you are having a problem, the older scouts and adults are there to help you!  You do not have to wait to tell us if you are upset about something.  After all, if the leaders do not know what might be troubling you, they cannot help you.  Be honest and ask for what you need.  If the leader you approach does not seem to be concerned or does not help you, then you can go to someone else.  For Troop 1 Richmond, the Senior Patrol Leader is Tom.  The adults who will be on site for the entire week are Mr. DeMerchant, Mr. Santagata, and Mr. Guillmette, while other leaders will come and go when they are available.  Mr. Jacques the scoutmaster will be on site for the first few days and after that he will be in camp every evening.

HELPING OUT.  Camp is about fun, but it also requires that you help out.  Clean up is part of camp.  You do it every day!  As your parent I expect you to help with chores.

FOLLOWING RULES.  No one likes getting in trouble.  Camp rules are put in place to keep you and others safe and to make sure people are respectful of each other.  Following rules and guidelines will help your week go smoother.  As your parent. I expect you to follow the rules!

TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF.  Make sure to eat right and get plenty of sleep, eat well, and wash your hands.  At camp you will be outside and more active than usual day after day.  If you stay up late and eat lots of junk food you could get exhausted, and you know how you get when you are overtired! 

BEING POSITIVE.  (A great thing to remind your first time camper is what his strong points are.  Focus not just on what he does well, but his positive qualities as well, such as what makes him a good friend or the type of person other kids would want to be friends with.  Helping children identify their strengths can help them when they are having a setback, one of those inevitable growing pains all children have from time to time.)

Talking with your son about these kinds of issues is a great way to support him as he gets ready to take this important step on the road to being more resilient and self-reliant.  For you as a parent it can give you more peace of mind as you allow your son to participate safely in a broader world away from home.